If you’re married, I’m also going to assume you want a marriage that’s healthy and truly lasts until death do you part. I want to suggest three principles that I have found to help my own relationship and the relationships of my friends. These principles all begin with the letter E: Three E’s to a Marvellous Marriage.

It’s ironic that we are selfish beings and at the same time seek to have a life-long, intimate, relationship which demands unselfishness. No wonder making a marvellous marriage is a struggle! If you fail to address your selfishness it won’t be long before your marriage suffers.

The first E to a marvellous marriage: Exclusiveness. Exclusiveness is being with only one person and putting the needs of that person before your own. It means loving another person more than you love yourself. Faced with a major decision Exclusiveness means you first ask yourself what will be best for your spouse and your marriage rather than what’s best for you. What are you putting before your spouse; what is getting in the way of deeper intimacy with the love of your life?

This week I invite you to make a conscious effort to make your spouse first in your life; love your lover more than you love yourself. Next week we will take a look at the next E to a marvellous marriage.