For those of you with a life partner, what do you love most of all about that person?
Last week in our series, The Three E’s to a Marvellous Marriage, we considered the first E: Exclusiveness. Your challenge was to begin making your mate first in your life; to love your lover more than you love yourself. Being truly Exclusive with your spouse will help you begin building a Marvellous Marriage and it will naturally lead to the next E in our series, Expression.
You probably know at least one person who is an expert at expression, particularly when it comes to pointing out what we do wrong. That’s not what I am talking about. Expression means communicating loving affirmation to your spouse. This can be quite challenging but it’s worth it. It has been found that consistent loving affirmation will affair-proof your marriage and ensure it’s success. (For a really good article on this, click here.)
There are many barriers to communicating love to your mate. One barrier is that our willingness to give loving affirmation comes and goes depending on mood or circumstances. Choosing to live out Exclusiveness means we strive to act on what is best for our partner at all times. Living our Expression means that regardless of the payoff, how we feel, or how our life is going we strive to always affirm our partner.
Another barrier is simply not being aware what love sounds like to your partner. Your mate may feel most loved when you spend time with her, giving her your undivided attention. Your spouse may feel most loved when you simply tell him how much you appreciate him, what he does, what he means to you. The point is you need to ask you partner when he or she feels most loved and then act on that information, expressing your love in a way they can best receive it.
Next week, we’ll look at our last E to a Marvellous Marriage.