Category Archives: Inspiration

Holding Space

11 Monday Jun 2018

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“Holding Space means that we are willing to walk alongside another person in whatever journey they’re on without judging them, making them feel inadequate, trying to fix them, or trying to impact the outcome. When we hold space for other people, we open our hearts, offer unconditional support, and let go of judgement and control.” ~Heather Plett

What does holding space feel like? Here’s a great example.

 

I am striving to be better at holding space for people. A great article that explores this topic is, What it Really Means to Hold Space for Someone. The author explores how she discovered how holding space was valuable and how to cultivate it in our lives. Here are a few quotes:

“By offering gentle, nonjudgmental support and guidance, she helped us walk one of the most difficult journeys of our lives.”

 

“Sometimes we find ourselves holding space for people while they hold space for others.”

 

“To truly support people in their own growth, transformation, grief, etc., we can’t do it by taking their power away (ie. trying to fix their problems), shaming them (ie. implying that they should know more than they do), or overwhelming them (ie. giving them more information than they’re ready for).”

I encourage you to read the whole article and incorporate as many of the insights as you can.

Do you hold space for others? What does that look like? Who holds space for you?

Irredeemable

14 Wednesday Feb 2018

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In honour of Valentines Day, I want to share a CS Lewis quote. I find this insight to be a good reminder of why love is worth risking.

I hope you are able to extend and receive love this week.

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything & your heart will certainly be wrung & possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one…but in that casket it will change. It will become unbreakable, irredeemable.”

The Sinister Mind

12 Monday Feb 2018

Posted by in Beginnings, Inspiration, recovery

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One of the hats I wear is co-founder and coordinator for COME2LIFE. COME2LIFE engages youth in emotional health conversations, inviting them to experience help, hope & healing. Our signature workshop is called, The Butterfly Effect, a two hour, interactive, presentation that gets us talking about what causes our emotional health to be in chaos.

Recently, we had the honour of presenting The Butterfly Effect to 120+ grade 7, 8, and 9 students. We’ve got a lot of positive response from the youth but a few days later, one of them sent us this poem. She said we could share it.

The Sinister Mind
By Taylor P.

When I am alone, my thoughts tear me apart
Ripping at my heart it does
I am sick of feeling this way, my words are completely numb
“Please make it stop.¨ I say, tears flow as my thoughts scream louder and louder
The pain is deafening, fear and dread rip through my veins
Shame and guilt are words that rip and tear at my slipping sanity like wild dogs
Shove happy pills down my throat, I don’t care
I want my needless hurt to stop
I don’t want to sink further under, stones tied to my ankles
I don’t want to feel miles of shame for things I’ve never done
I want to be happy, calm, at peace
I don’t want to feel comfort by taking sharp metal to my scarred skin
My eyes burn red, my mouth feels dry
I want to sleep, I don’t want to eat
I want to be okay

As I make my way through the dark
I see a light, a placid light
The light caresses my face and brushes through my hair
It’s feather soft to the touch
It engulfs my body, covering every crevasse and every space
It wraps around the miles of skin that I possess
It’s warm and sweet and suddenly I am okay
Suddenly the light has returned in my eyes
For the first time in a long time, I am at peace
No more shame, no more guilt
The burden of being miserable is gone
The ache of being me is gone
The mirror is no longer an enemy
The demons that lurk in my mind remain nothing but ashes
The monsters that hide in my world are now the fuel that makes me stronger
As the wounds turn to scars, this battle was won
I made it through the grenades of doubt and the bullets of hate
I am free at last.

 

 

 

 

Not Without You

07 Monday Aug 2017

Posted by in Inspiration, relationships, Spirituality

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I recently heard an apparently true story about a man urgently needing to catch a plane home from a business trip. He was desperate to get home because his toddler grandson lay in a coma, the victim of terrible child abuse at the hands of his mom’s live in boyfriend. The little boy wasn’t going to live; he was to be disconnected from life support. After he died, his organs would be donated so others might live. The man wanted to get home to see his grandson one more time.

While he was on the way to the Los Angeles airport, his wife called Southwestern airlines to find the fastest flight home. As she bought the ticket she explained their desperate situation. Unfortunately, her husband ran into delay after delay – a traffic jam on the freeway, a congested airport, delays in security.

When the man finally reached the gate for his flight, he realized he was 15 minutes late, he was sure the plane had left.

An airline employee at the gate approached him and asked his name and if he was the one trying to get home to his grandson. The man confirmed who he was.

Then the man at the gate said:

“Well, I’m the pilot and the plane isn’t going anywhere without me.
And I’m not going anywhere without you.”

That story reminds me of one of my most favourite Bible passages:

“Do not let your hearts be troubled.
You believe in God; believe also in me.
My Father’s house has many rooms;
if that were not so, would I have told you
that I am going there to prepare a place for you?
And if I go and prepare a place for you,
I will come back and take you to be with me
that you also may be where I am.”
(John 14:1-3 New International Version)

Jesus’ promise is loaded with hope, love and acceptance. He is making this promise to his friends who, in just hours while he is in his greatest struggle, will desert him, betray him, deny him. He’s saying, despite all your failures, hang on to me, hang on to me because I want you to be with me. It’s a promise we can personally claim today. Isn’t that pretty outrageous grace?

Because Jesus’ promise can be counted on, we know that he will prepare those places and he will return. The Bible vividly describes this event – Jesus will arrive with all his angels, the dead in Christ will be resurrected, the living in Christ will be transformed and all will be gathered by the angels – he will take us to be with him.

I hear Jesus’ promise echo to you and to me in the pilot’s words:

“I’m the pilot and the angels aren’t going anywhere without me.
And I’m not
going anywhere
without
you.”

 

The Meeting

31 Wednesday May 2017

Posted by in Beginnings, Inspiration, Spirituality

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One of my favourite authors had a picture given to her of the great reunion that is coming soon.  I did a little editing for length.

“(At the second coming) The living righteous are changed “in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye.” At the voice of God they were glorified; now they are made immortal and with the risen saints are caught up to meet their Lord in the air. Angels “gather together His elect from the four winds, from one end of heaven to the other.” Little children are borne by holy angels to their mothers’ arms. Friends long separated by death are united, nevermore to part, and with songs of gladness ascend together to the City of God.

Before entering the City of God, the Saviour bestows upon His followers the emblems of victory and invests them with the insignia of their royal state… Upon the heads of the overcomers, Jesus with His own right hand places the crown of glory. For each there is a crown, bearing his own “new name” (Revelation 2:17), and the inscription, “Holiness to the Lord.”

As the ransomed ones are welcomed to the City of God, there rings out upon the air an exultant cry of adoration. The two Adams are about to meet. The Son of God is standing with outstretched arms to receive the father of our race—the being whom He created, who sinned against his Maker, and for whose sin the marks of the crucifixion are borne upon the Saviour’s form. As Adam discerns the prints of the cruel nails, he does not fall upon the bosom of his Lord, but in humiliation casts himself at His feet, crying: “Worthy, worthy is the Lamb that was slain!” Tenderly the Saviour lifts him up and bids him look once more upon the Eden home from which he has so long been exiled.

The Saviour leads him to the tree of life and plucks the glorious fruit and bids him eat. He looks about him and beholds a multitude of his family redeemed, standing in the Paradise of God. Then he casts his glittering crown at the feet of Jesus and, falling upon His breast, embraces the Redeemer. The family of Adam take up the strain, “Worthy, worthy, worthy is the Lamb that was slain, and lives again!” and cast their crowns at the Saviour’s feet as they bow before Him in adoration.

This reunion is witnessed by the angels who wept at the fall of Adam and rejoiced when Jesus, after His resurrection, ascended to heaven, having opened the grave for all who should believe on His name. Now they behold the work of redemption accomplished, and they unite their voices in the song of praise.”

Would you like to be there?

Glory

Zip It

12 Friday May 2017

Posted by in Inspiration, Observations

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Got this from a friend. Not sure why.

Twenty occasions where we should keep our mouths shut:Proverbs 21-23

1. In the heat of anger. Proverbs 14:17

2. When you don’t have all the facts. Proverbs 18:13

3. When you haven’t verified the story. Deuteronomy 17:6

4. If your words will offend a weaker brother. 1 Corinthians 8:11

5. If your words will be a poor reflection of the Lord or your friends and family. Peter 2:21-23

6. When you are tempted to joke about sin. Proverbs 14:9

7. When you would be ashamed of your words later. Proverbs 8:8

8. When you’re tempted to make light of holy things. Ecclesiastes 5:2

9. If your words would convey a wrong impression. Proverbs 17:27

10. If the issue is none of your business. Proverbs 14:10

11. When you are tempted to tell an outright lie. Proverbs 4:24

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12. If your words will damage someone’s reputation. Proverbs 16:27

13. If your words will destroy a friendship. Proverbs 25:28

14. When you are feeling critical. James 3:9

15. If you can’t speak without yelling. Proverbs 25:28

16. When it is time to listen. Proverbs 13:1

17. If you may have to eat your words later. Proverbs 18:21

18. If you have already said it more than one time (and it becomes nagging). Proverbs 19:13

19. When you are tempted to flatter a wicked person. Proverbs 24:24

20. When you are supposed to be working instead. Proverbs 14:23

Here’s the thing that occurred to me. The Bible verses are a nice reinforcement but do you really need the Bible to tell you any of the above? Don’t they seem like things decent human beings, just like you, would do?

 

The Warmth of His Heart

05 Friday May 2017

Posted by in Inspiration, Spirituality

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Have you ever felt a little lost? Have you even felt like you’ve wandered into places you never intended to go.  Check out this beautiful insight into a popular parable.
In the parable the shepherd goes out to search for one sheep—the very least that can be numbered. So if there had been but one lost soul, Christ would have died for that one.
The sheep that has strayed from the fold is the most helpless of all creatures. It must be sought for by the shepherd, for it cannot find its way back. So with the soul that has wandered away from God; he is as helpless as the lost sheep, and unless divine love had come to his rescue he could never find his way to God.
The shepherd who discovers that one of his sheep is missing does not look carelessly upon the flock that is safely housed, and say, “I have ninety and nine, and it will cost me too much trouble to go in search of the straying one. Let him come back, and I will open the door of the sheepfold, and let him in.” No; no sooner does the sheep go astray than the shepherd is filled with grief and anxiety. He counts and recounts the flock. When he is sure that one sheep is lost, he slumbers not. He leaves the ninety and nine within the fold, and goes in search of the straying sheep. The darker and more tempestuous the night and the more perilous the way, the greater is the shepherd’s anxiety and the more earnest his search. He makes every effort to find that one lost sheep.
With what relief he hears in the distance its first faint cry. Following the sound, he climbs the steepest heights, he goes to the very edge of the precipice, at the risk of his own life. Thus he searches, while the cry, growing fainter, tells him that his sheep is ready to die. At last his effort is rewarded; the lost is found. Then he does not scold it because it has caused him so much trouble. He does not drive it with a whip. He does not even try to lead it home. In his joy he takes the trembling creature upon his shoulders; if it is bruised and wounded, he gathers it in his arms, pressing it close to his bosom, that the warmth of his own heart may give it life. With gratitude that his search has not been in vain, he bears it back to the fold.
Thank God, He has presented to our imagination no picture of a sorrowful shepherd returning without the sheep. The parable does not speak of failure but of success and joy in the recovery. Here is the divine guarantee that not even one of the straying sheep of God’s fold is overlooked, not one is left unsuccored. Every one that will submit to be ransomed, Christ will rescue from the pit of corruption and from the briers of sin.
This excerpt is from page 188 of the devotional book, “Christ’s Object Lessons.”

Put Shame to Shame

28 Friday Apr 2017

Posted by in Inspiration, Spirituality

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If you can, check out this link and listen to the audio message. It’s a young person sharing their story about eating disorder recovery, redemption and seeing shame put to shame. It’s very powerful. Click the text below to get to the page.

“Is there anything you feel ashamed of? Your appearance, performance, or past mistakes? Discover how Jesus feels about you in your most embarrassing moments.”

 

Diversion Tactics – Word Salad

05 Wednesday Apr 2017

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Lately, I’ve been discovering common behaviours of Narcissists, Sociopaths And Psychopaths. Keep in mind that those are personality disorders and it’s not a good idea to go around labelling people just because they’re jerks. While I’ve been learning, I found an article by  Shahida Arabi at http://thoughtcatalog.com/shahida-arabi/2016/06/20-diversion-tactics-highly-manipulative-narcissists-sociopaths-and-psychopaths-use-to-silence-you/. Shahida the author of the book She Who Destroys the Light: Fairy Tales Gone Wrong.

I want to highlight a few of the tactics Shadida Arabi includes in her article. Please read the whole article so you can get the full picture.

Toxic people tend to use diversion tactics to escape accountability for their actions and silence you, the target of their abuse. If this is happening to you, I hope you are able to get help and establish healthy boundaries so you may experience hope and healing.

Word Salad

Word salad consists of circular conversations, ad hominem arguments, projection and gaslighting. The toxic person is attempting to ‘discredit, confuse and frustrate you, distract you, and make you feel guilty.’

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“Cut the interaction short as soon as you anticipate it escalating and use your energy on some decadent self-care instead.”

I had prepared and schedule this post some weeks back. Then Time magazine published an interview by Michael Scherer with #45. If you have never experienced a toxic person using word salad I believe this is a perfect example. I encourage you to check it out but note that it will likely make your head spin – which is what word salad is meant to do.

 

A Conversation

25 Saturday Mar 2017

Posted by in Discovery, Inspiration, Observations, questions, Spirituality

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I stumbled across this and it’s too good not to share. The reference is at the end. I did a little editing so it makes sense out of it’s original context but the meaning is intact.

Imagine that our Good, Good Father appears visibly among us this evening. How would we speak to him? Or to make it more personal, let us say that he is willing to meet us in our living room. As many of us as could, would go over there and gather around him, just as the crowds did around Jesus—Mary loved to sit there at his feet.

Now, as we walk into the room, we know that God is the all-powerful Creator of the whole vast universe. We know that the mighty angels, sinless as they are, stand overwhelmed with awe and wonder at the majesty and glory of our God. Yet, though that all be true, if we are afraid to go in, then God has failed to convince us of the truth about himself. And Jesus has failed to convince us, not just with his words, but with what he has demonstrated to be true when he was here, that God is infinitely powerful, but equally gracious, and there is no need to be afraid. How could we turn down what he has paid such a price to reveal?

God is seated there and we are gathered around him. What should we say? Should we be the first to speak? Once we have started speaking, would we talk all the time? Or would we let God speak for a while? Normally, when we pray we do all the talking, don’t we? And then we say Amen, and go about our business, or go to sleep. It would be like meeting in the room with our Heavenly Father, and talking to him incessantly for several minutes, and then saying, “Amen, thank you very much,” and then going home. It wouldn’t make sense, would it? It certainly wouldn’t be conversation as with a friend.

Supposing we should have the inestimable privilege of talking there freely with God the Father for a whole hour; would it be appropriate at the end for someone among us to arise and say, “This has been such a special occasion, don’t you think we ought to close this meeting with a word of prayer?” Or would it be correct to understand that talking, conversing, having conversation with our God as with a Friend for that whole hour actually is real prayer, and we have been praying the whole hour long?

Conversation means at least two people speaking. But how do we converse with God when we can’t see him just now, because of the present emergency? We all understand that emergency and why in mercy he does not reveal himself visibly to us at this moment. And so, the Bible is called the Word of God—God speaking to us. If we wish to hear God speak, except in most extraordinary occasions, God speaks to us through the Bible. We speak to him in prayer.

Truly, as someone has said, “We commune with God through the study of the Scriptures.” I certainly find prayer much more meaningful while reading the Bible. Have you ever had the experience of talking to God while reading certain parts of the Scriptures? Have you ever found yourself talking out loud, “That’s magnificent!”? Who are you talking to? But that’s real conversation. We read, we listen in that way. And then we talk back to God.

Graham Maxwell. Excerpt from the audio series, Conversations About God, #15, “Talking to God as a Friend” recorded May, 1984, Loma Linda, California.