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cultural atheist

~ Rejecting the gods of our culture since 1998.

cultural atheist

Monthly Archives: October 2016

11 Underused Words You Really Need To Start Using — BayArt

30 Sunday Oct 2016

Posted by braddahr in Observations

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To me the challenge is to use all these words in a single sentence…

 

“The English language has more words in its lexicon than any other,” says Jerry Herron, dean of WSU‘s Irvin D. Reid Honors College and a member of the website’s editorial board. “By making use of the repertoire available to us, we expand our ability to communicate clearly and help make our world a more interesting…

via 11 Underused Words You Really Need To Start Using — BayArt

The 3 Surprising Benefits of Play — #MagnificentMik

29 Saturday Oct 2016

Posted by braddahr in Observations

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Play and rest are the two critical ways of life that help us be resilient to shame while helping us embrace the blessing of vulnerability.  Check out this short overview on play.

 

What do I mean when I say “Play?” Activities that make you happy and that make you, you! We devalue play when we were taught that being a grown up meant work = Being Serious Is the opposite of play…work? Here are the three surprising benefits of play: 1. Stimulates Creativity Do you remember playing with blocks, leggos, […]

via The 3 Surprising Benefits of Play — #MagnificentMik

Care of The Body

27 Thursday Oct 2016

Posted by braddahr in Observations, recovery

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Tags

Abuse, care, healing, recovery, relationships, self-care

For yourself or someone you care about, you need to check out this video. It’s not very long but it contains a powerful insight concerning our need to care for ur physical self as we also care for our emotional self.

Here is a quote from the page:
“We need to tend to our bodies,” says Dr. Dan Allender in this video, part of our ongoing series engaging topics related to trauma, abuse, and the hope for healing. Dan invites us to consider how our treatment of our bodies might exacerbate or perpetuate the effects of trauma in our lives. “We are to go no further in the engagement of our past and the trauma of our story than we can care for our body in the present,” says Dan. “Your body cannot endure ongoing stress and trauma without certain levels of attending care.”

Monarch’s pilgrimage — thefeatheredsleep

26 Wednesday Oct 2016

Posted by braddahr in Observations

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A hair slide of freckles splashed by residue rain clinging to gutter midnight bird, black feathers glowing electric blue in late afternoon sun scoop and peck for migrating butterflies cut down by cars careless of their need like so many other things, like so many other things fallen out of time and who to […]

via Monarch’s pilgrimage — thefeatheredsleep

A Typical Monday Morning

24 Monday Oct 2016

Posted by braddahr in Observations

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Tags

broken, recovery, stinking thinking

A friend shared this with me and as I read the list, I thought to myself, that’s what I call “A Typical Monday Morning.

Common Cognitive Distortions

A partial list from Robert L. Leahy, Stephen J. F. Holland, and Lata K. McGinn’s Treatment Plans and Interventions for Depression and Anxiety Disorders (2012).

1. Mind reading. You assume that you know what people think without having sufficient evidence of their thoughts. “He thinks I’m a loser.”

2. Fortune-telling. You predict the future negatively: things will get worse, or there is danger ahead. “I’ll fail that exam,” or “I won’t get the job.”

3. Catastrophizing.You believe that what has happened or will happen will be so awful and unbearable that you won’t be able to stand it. “It would be terrible if I failed.”

4. Labeling. You assign global negative traits to yourself and others. “I’m undesirable,” or “He’s a rotten person.”

5. Discounting positives. You claim that the positive things you or others do are trivial. “That’s what wives are supposed to do—so it doesn’t count when she’s nice to me,” or “Those successes were easy, so they don’t matter.”

6. Negative filtering. You focus almost exclusively on the negatives and seldom notice the positives. “Look at all of the people who don’t like me.”

7. Overgeneralizing. You perceive a global pattern of negatives on the basis of a single incident. “This generally happens to me. I seem to fail at a lot of things.”

8. Dichotomous thinking. You view events or people in all-or-nothing terms. “I get rejected by everyone,” or “It was a complete waste of time.”

9. Blaming. You focus on the other person as the source of your negative feelings, and you refuse to take responsibility for changing yourself. “She’s to blame for the way I feel now,” or “My parents caused all my problems.”

10. What if? You keep asking a series of questions about “what if” something happens, and you fail to be satisfied with any of the answers. “Yeah, but what if I get anxious?,” or “What if I can’t catch my breath?”

11. Emotional reasoning. You let your feelings guide your interpretation of reality. “I feel depressed; therefore, my marriage is not working out.”

12. Inability to disconfirm. You reject any evidence or arguments that might contradict your negative thoughts. For example, when you have the thought I’m unlovable, you reject as irrelevant any evidence that people like you. Consequently, your thought cannot be refuted. “That’s not the real issue. There are deeper problems. There are other factors.”

On Feeling — BeautyBeyondBones

24 Monday Oct 2016

Posted by braddahr in Observations

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Another great post from BeautyBeyondBones.

Facebook is a funny thing. Honestly, you never know what you’re going to get when you pop on The Book. Will you see a hostile political rant? A funny meme about cats and Crossfitters? A pregnancy/engagement announcement? It’s a veritable grab-bag of posts that can either make you dry heave, bust out laughing or hard […]

via On Feeling — BeautyBeyondBones

A Toxic Dance

21 Friday Oct 2016

Posted by braddahr in Observations

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Tags

Abuse, health, parents, recovery, relationships, Shame, toxic

This realization troubles me because it’s my understanding that when a child’s sense of love and belonging is destabilized in the home, they are at greater risk of being abused.

For more on this, check out Shannon Thomas’ book “Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse.”

img_1454

Control of Choice

19 Wednesday Oct 2016

Posted by braddahr in Observations, recovery

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Tags

Abuse, Control, Decisions, Freedom, Growth, Shame

This is a powerful realization. I have witnessed this first hand and it’s so sad.

For more on this, check out Shannon Thomas’ book “Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse.”

img_1404

Hitting Where it Hurts 

15 Saturday Oct 2016

Posted by braddahr in Observations, recovery

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Tags

healing, recovery, relationships, toxic

When I was in junior high school, I very badly cut the top of my thumb; I had ten stitches. During a lunch time floor hockey game, I was playing well, one kid who was a bully decided he would hit and grab at my stitches. This thought reminded me of that experience and how it’s a physical example of what I have seen a narcissist do to others. 

Image

Leggo That Ego

13 Thursday Oct 2016

Tags

Abuse, ego, health, narcissists, personal, protection, relationships, truth

Here’s another excellent insight from Southlake Christian Counselling. Shannon Thomas’ book, “Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse” is an very good resource on the topic of abuse.

img_1438

Posted by braddahr | Filed under Observations, recovery

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